Hick and Willie Judge a ‘Video’ Contest

by James Cummins

 

Hick:  

Whaddya got for the video contest?  I hope a rave.
Just watched a piece about the David on Sister Wendy’s
show.  Didn’t her dad start the hamburger chain, ‘Wendy’s’?
Or was that another Dave?

 

Willie:  

I got sucker-punched by ‘The Hungary Games’—
‘extreme rendition,’ thirty types, from Hungary.  Cute.
Torture, 24/7, directed by some clown named ‘Jack Boot.’
Whatever happened to Ruby Keeler in Dames?

 

Hick:

You got me—sadly.  Well, let’s turn on the idiot box—
they sent us a ton of DVDs to lend our expertise to.
Here’s one on celebrity hair: Demi’s Do.
Or here’s a guy who eats road kill.  Oh cripes, is that a fox?!

 

Willie:

I think I may be sick.  Shoot, there must be some things!
Here’s one: I Never Metanarrative I Didn’t Like.  Ew.  Ever notice
how clever tenure makes you?  Like a lotus
to the head.  I’m ordering lunch—you want dumplings?